Montag, 19. März 2007

Familie - familiy and real moms....

Nur kurz als update, hier ist mal wieder das Lazarett ausgebrochen. Seit gestern fiebert Johanna und sie hat die ganze Nacht gehustet ohne Ende. Und heute morgen waren die Augen eitrig, also war ein Besuch beim Kinderarzt fällig. Bingo, jetzt hat sie die Bindehautenzündung, mindestens drei bis vier Tage kein Kindergarten...was solls, das kriegen wir auch noch hin.

In letzter Zeit merke ich immer mehr, daß die Mädels sich mit uns beschäftigen. Mit uns als Familie. Den Begriff kennen sie noch nicht, aber sie wissen wer zusammen gehört. Ganz oft zählen sie auf, Mama, Papa, Hanna, Lisa, Bana (Belana) und Lou (Milou, die Katze). Wenn einer fehlt wird das bemerkt. "Wo ist Papa hin?" oder "Lou soll wieder rein...", wenn die Katze auf Freigang ist.
Heute war ja Louisa alleine im Kindergarten, weil Johanna krank war. Ich habe sie gefragt, ob sie allein hin möchte und es war keine Frage, "ja!". Beide haben mir ständig erklärt, was Sache ist, Johanna ist krank und muß da bleiben und Louisa war sehr stolz, daß sie alleine mit dem Papa hin ist, und daß Mama und Johanna sie abholen werden. Sie haben sich auch gewunken und Tschüß gesagt. Nach einer Weile hat Johanna immer wieder gefragt, "Wo ist mein Papa und wo ist meine Lisa?". Ich habe es ihr erklärt und es war ok. Als wir dann Louisa im Kindergarten abgeholt haben, war die Wiedersehensfreude kaum zu bremsen. Sie haben sich umarmt und Louisa hat gerufen "Hanna, endlich bist du wieder da!"

Auch heute, nach dem Mittagsschlaf hat Louisa ihre Johanna vermißt. Johanna wacht immer früher auf und darf dann schon mit mir runter. Als Louisa aufgewacht ist, hat sie heftig geweint, weil ihre "Hanna" nicht mehr da war und sie wollte, daß sie wieder kommt und sich "da" hinlegt in ihr Bett.
Ich freu mich, daß es jetzt hin und wieder besser klappt, denn wir hatten hier ja eine ganze Weile eher Streit als Harmonie.
Ich kann mich nicht entscheiden, welches von den Fotos ich nehmen soll, deshalb bekommt ihr alle drei (man sieht Johannas krankes Auge ganz gut)

Just a short update at the beginning, we are sick again. To be honest Johanna is the one who is having a fever and is coughing her brains out. This morning I could tell by her eyes that now she has the conjunctivitis as well and again we went to the paediatrician. (sooner or later we need to rent a parking lot over there…) Well, we were right, she caught an infection and her eyes were bad, no kindergarden for the next three to four days…we are going to manage that.

But what I really wanted to talk about is the fact that I recognized that the girls start to know who belongs together as a family. They still don’t know what family means, but they count “Mama, Papa, Hanna, Lisa, Bana (Belana, our dog), Lou (Milou, our cat). When somebody is missing they are wondering “Who is dad?” or “Where is Lou gone?” when she is away searching for trouble (everybody, who has a cat knows what I mean)

Today Louisa went to kindergarden alone, because of Johanna’s illness. I asked her if she wanted to go and she definitely said “yes”. Everything was fine, they waved to each other good bye and Louisa was excited to learn that mom and Johanna will come to pick her up. But after a while Johanna asked “Where is my dad and where is my Lisa?” I explained it to her and it was ok, but when we picked up Louisa they were so glad that they embraced and hugged each other. Louisa said “You are finally here, Hanna!” I really had tears in my eyes.

I could not decide wich pic to choose so you get all three. You can tell that Johanna has a bad eye.

I have been tagged by shanilie regarding what a real mom is. Here is my answer:

"Real” can mean a lot of things in german. Well this is not easy to answer and I promised to myself not to peak, what all the others wrote before I published what I think about it.

For me, a real mum, is a real person. She is a woman who suddenly at a very special date became a mum. And suddenly everybody expect her to become an angel never thinking about herself anymore only always having the concerns of her kids in her mind and doing this with a smile and loving it.
I’m very oft tired after too many interruptions in the night, I’m angry with my girls because they floated the bathroom, have no nerves because they fight and argue about everything, I’m bored because I need to sing the “Old McDonald has a farm”-song a hundred times. And to be honest, I sometimes refuse to do it. I forget at least twice a week that my girls need a lunch for kindergarden and then I rush to get something not so healthy for them. I sometimes let them eat chocolate in the morning because I need to get into that shower in time and without that it would mean endless hours of discussion. I skip their bathing time, because it always is such a struggle washing their hair and all three of us decide that next week is a another good time to wash hair. I could go on with that endlessly…

But I love them so much. Just to think that something might happen to them makes me cry…

I don’t think I’m a really good mother, but I guess I’m a real mother. I think there are a lot of mother like me out there.

Kommentare:

  1. Oh Ute, you ARE a great mother!! All moms have their good days AND bad days! Don't be so hard on yourself~you're a great Mom :)

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  2. Ute! YOu are a WONDERFUL mom times two! That makes you extra special:) I think that twins are only born to those Mom's that can truly handle it! I loved your post because it is so honest! Believe me when I say that I have felt very simliar on all of these!

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  3. Ute, I really enjoyed reading your meme. It was so touching, and I can see how much you love your girls. It was so open and honest. You sure said it right when you said one special day you became a Mom. We all have our ups and downs but you are their mother and a great one at that. That is the highest calling. Thank you for sharing and participating :)

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  4. Trust me, Ute, you are a good mother. You are only tired out and needing some alone time at those moments, but that is what a mother is, she neglects herself to be there for her children. You love them no matter what and don't "beat yourself up" for not singing the Old MacDonald song for them all the time. They have to learn that they don't always get what they want in life, not even from mum. Thank you for sharing. I was supposed to do this one as well, but I haven't gotten around to it yet. Great post Ute!

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